Freedom From Fear

I am putting a disclaimer on this song. My inner "rock chic" is coming out. If you don't like rock music you might not like it. The group is called "Fireflight". I love how they express this song. I feel like this toward the enemy. He tries to accuse us and hold us back from our dreams with fear. So, if you like rock and roll turn it up and enjoy!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Recently I posted that I had a speech to give at "The Optimist Club". That was the name of the gathering. Some of you may have read my speech. I want to thank anyone who prayed. It was very much needed and appreciated.

The topic was "What makes you come alive" I was asked by my friend to speak and something in me said "yes". After I said yes, I wanted to take it back because of fear. Did I really have anything to say and could I possibly say it in front of 30 people? Has anyone ever been so afraid of something you just avoid it?

I have had a bad experience with public speaking in the past and was very afraid of a repeat performance.

One of the reasons I call this blog finally free is to be free of fear in my life. I used to be afraid of social situations, people, rejection, authority figures, dissaproval, and the list goes on and on. I have been able to conquer a lot of fear with God's help. As I have experienced His Love I have grown in my ability to confront a lot of my fear. "Public Speaking" is not one that I had faced yet. I literally did not take speech class in college and prayed that any classes I took would not make me speak front of the class. I used to almost have a panic attack to think of doing this.

This is what makes this story of God's faithfulness so amazing. Starting about three days before the night of the speech I started feeling a lot of anxiety. For anyone who doesn't know anxiety is just a lot of fear. One night I laid on the floor and just cried out to God because I did not think I could do it. I was thinking of ways to cancel. I told God if He did not help me I was done.

So, the night comes and I am so scared. No, terrified. I am reading and rereading my speech while others are speaking. Then, all of sudden, something....it must of been the Holy Spirit, gave me the courage to put my written speech in my purse. I know this sound crazy. It was kind of like flying without a net. It was like the Spirit wanted me to trust God and just speak "from my heart".

At that moment I felt like I let go of all MY resources and let the Holy Spirit take over. I let go of control and trusted God with the results. It was a powerful moment for me to let go of fear and trust God.

When I stood up to speak I just started talking about what I do as a counselor and what God has done in my life. I noticed that a lot of the people in the audience were touched and wiping away tears. My husband and my friend said they were fighting the tears. It was amazing and I felt empowered by God to speak about His love and His freedom.

When I came home my husband couldn't stop talking about how great I had done. He said I looked like a professional. I think I am still in shock! He said I did not even look nervous. I think He was in shock, too. This is funny because the night before I was literally freaking out trying to read it to Him.

I just want to share this to encourage anyone who is struggling with fear. The only way to conquer it is to hold onto God's hand and say a prayer and walk through the fear.

I am happy that I no longer am in bondage to the fear of public speaking. I am not going to advertise my services just yet, but I am free.

What are you afraid of? I encourage you to face it. It feels really good to have that behind me and my trust in God has grown as a result.

Blessings,

Tammy